Premature Ejaculation

By Andrew Kline MD, Medical Consultant
April 02, 2012

Nothing is worse than squirting your load too early. Most men feel embarrassed or worried about premature ejaculation, but it’s nothing to feel bad about – it happens to all men some of the time. The good news is that it’s a controllable problem, and with a few techniques you can prevent it. Your doctor can also help, either be recommending techniques for you and your partner, or prescribing a serotonin-reuptake inhibitor to reduce sexual responsiveness. If you think that your premature ejaculation is related to anxiety about your performance in bed, your ability to please your partner, or the size of your penis, consider using male enhancement supplements to increase your size and sexual stamina.

Think About Sex

Creative visualization is a good way to combat your worries about sexual performance. Picture yourself having sex with your mate, and in your visualization, imagine lasting for as long as you want and feeling ready to cum when you ejaculate. Envision being relaxed and at ease and engaging in foreplay and a long period of thrusting before releasing your load. Set aside a time each day to work on imagining successful sex, such as after you shower in the morning or before you go to sleep at night. You might want to pair creative visualization with other relaxation techniques, such as meditation.

Make Yourself Cum Before Sex

Making yourself cum before a night of passion is a tried and true method of reducing your sexual anxiety and excitability. Ejaculating a few hours before a date will also help you appear more relaxed and less concerned with sex to your partner, which will make you much more appealing. If you have a very strong sex drive, make yourself cum once in the morning before your date, and again just before it. Don’t try to “save it for her” if you’re concerned with cumming too early.

Release Pelvic Tension

Frequently, premature ejaculation is associated with too much tension in the pelvic muscles, especially along the pelvic floor. The pelvic floor is the muscles between your anus and your penis, and they control penis movement, as well as the ability to hold urine. Keep your pelvic floor strong with exercises designed to enhance it, but also ensure it is relaxes so that it doesn’t cause you to cum too early. Have your partner massage the area with scented lubricant to relax you before sex. A full body massage is also a good way to reduce overall tension before sex, which will help you last longer.

Have Sex More Often

Men who have sex frequently, and ejaculate with partners frequently, have fewer problems with premature ejaculation than men with few sexual partners. If you have a problem with cumming too early, then remember that practice makes perfect. If you’re anxiety about your sexual performance, your ability to please your partner sexually, the size of your penis, or how soon you cum inhibits you from pursuing sex, then you are only making matters worse. Frequent sex will reduce your performance anxiety (which causes premature ejaculation) as well as raise the threshold of stimulation required to make you cum, which is an important factor in reducing premature ejaculation.

Stay Off the Sauce

Use and abuse of legal and illegal drugs, such as marijuana, diazepam, alcohol, and other substances can cause you to have reduced control over your penis. This means you might not get as big and hard as you would like, and you also might cum too early. It’s better for your overall health to avoid these items as much as possible, but you should certainly avoid them when you’re having sex. Besides, being under the influence won’t make you any better able to find a women’s clitoris or thrust to hit her G-spot – on the contrary, you are less likely to do these things when you’re high or drunk.

Reduce Stimulation

Get in the habit of being comfortable telling your partner to slow down the speed, intensity, or pressure of her touch so that she doesn’t cause you to cum too early accidentally. Tell her you want to last for her, and experiment with very light touches or indirect stimulation so that you don’t get too excited before you penetrate her. If you rebound quickly between orgasms, ask her to make you cum once with her hands or mouth before you penetrate her – this will help you last longer during intercourse.

Think About Something Else

Since you’re already having sex, thinking about sex at the same time is probably going to overstimulate you to the point that you cum. Instead, think about other things while you’re thrusting. Some men like to do math equations or think about current events. If you don’t want to do that, think about fun times you’ve spent with your partner when you weren’t having sex.